Friday, August 16, 2013

Carry a Baby for Money?

Would you be a surrogate for a certain sum? With being 6 months pregnant, I wonder about this. I'm not talking about carrying my biological child but the biological child of the parents to be.

From the moment I found out I was pregnant, I loved my baby. At first it felt a little unreal but as I started to experience constant fatigue and sickness, it became more real. I truly loved my baby when I felt movement for the first time. It would be so hard to carry a baby and feel it move and know that I wasn't planning on being the baby's mommy at the end.

Aside from the happiness of being pregnant, there are some not so great things about it. Extreme fatigue, "morning" sickness, heartburn, acid reflux and back pain are some of the more common ailments. My body often hurts as things shift and expand to make room for baby. I could feel when my ab muscles were slowly stretched apart. Weight gain and stretch marks go along with pregnancy. Labor and delivery aren't exactly a walk in the park either.

So, would I go through all this for a certain amount of money? No.

But I would go through this for a friend or sister who was unable to carry a child at no charge. I could never carry a baby and give it away to never be part of its life moving forward. There would never be enough money to be okay with giving the baby I carried to strangers. Only love would allow me to carry a baby for a loved one.

Is there an amount you would be a surrogate for? Could you do it for a loved one for no money?

8 comments:

  1. Another reason that I was thinking about this is that I actually offered to be a surrogate this week for a friend. She declined and they are trying to adopt. They have one biological child but have been unsuccessful in getting pregnant in 2.5 years. Sometimes I feel weirdly guilty that I'm expecting...

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  2. I could, probably. do it for my sister or best friend but I would never take money for it. But it would complicate situation quite a bit...

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  3. I could do it, I think. But only once I was done having my own kids. I would feel like a foster parent in a way, I think. There was a lady from the MSN boards who had been a surrogate twice for a couple in another country. She was able to keep in touch and see how the children were growing and see their family.

    Then again, with my track record, I highly doubt I could qualify as a surrogate.

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  4. My cousin carried a child for her sister several years ago. While it was wonderful there have been problems now and again because the cousin has a habit of throwing it in her face sometimes.

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  5. After everything we went through to have children, I know the heartache of feeling like you will never have a child. My pregnancies were complicated (I had 3 pregnancies, 2 twin pg and 1 singleton), so physically I could not be a surro. BUT, if you put all of it aside and assume that I would be a surro candidate....I think I could do it for a stranger, but not a close person. I would be a gestational surro...no biological relation. And while it may be hard to hand that baby to someone and never see them again....I would know that this child is not mine.

    But I couldn't do it for someone I know. Seeing that child and knowing that I carried him or her....that would be too hard.

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  6. As I got all of my twin sister's eggs when our egg split (this happens in 1 in 4 sets of identical twin girls, one girl is sterile) I would have carried a child for her. But she asked me too late. I had already had 5 full term pregnancies and I was over 40. So I just share my girls with her. After all they might have been her eggs!

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  7. I would be a surrogate to a stranger for $2 million. No less. That's how much money I would need today to not have to worry about money for the rest of my life. But then again it's hard for me to comprehend the emotional and physical experiences of surrogacy since I don't even have a uterus ;)

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  8. It's an interesting question. Quite double sided and sharp on both edges. As a person who is single with no intentions of coupling or having natural children (I'd look to adopt on the older range vs toddlers), I'd have no intention of coping with pregnancy. That said, I may be an excellent candidate, since I am able to and, on the surface, wouldn't have much attachment or desire to keep the child. For money, and how much? I don't know. For someone I know? I don't know either. I'll say it'd be easier for a stranger than someone I know. I'd need to do a lot of thinking before honestly answering that.

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